Ten Observations I Made While Failing To Get Into A Free Screening Of "Burn After Reading"

1. There goes my only post idea for the day. I have nothing to review.

2. Those bitches in the next line over are carrying a pizza. That's just mean, dude.

3. People keep cutting into this line. I'm making the next one faceplant, I swear to God.

4. And now an old guy's doing it. He should know better. I will take his Medicare away.

5. Maybe I can see something else if I don't get in. Perhaps "Mamma Mia!". I'd have to give up my remaining man card, though, the one that I didn't lose when I shamelessly watched "Love Actually" on a pseudo-date. It didn't work, either.

6. I hate hands-free cell phones. Especially when someone is talking to someone else who shares my name.

7. They're moving the lines....Oh, shit. Dude, we got here an hour and a half early.

8. I know for a fact that the theater this is being shown in is NOT filled to capacity. You, sir, are filled with lies!

9. They're giving out free passes for an upcoming screening of "Eagle Eye". That is hardly a consolation prize.

10. I feel like I'm getting a little abrasive over not getting my free movie. This being said, fuck AMC.